Launching a Waste Fast Month & Assessing the Stress Fast

Waste Month Strategy: I made a list of things I would like to do for waste month and came up with more than 7 items.  In the interest of preserving my sanity, I'm only going to commit to 7 items.

Car pool to work at least 4 times during May.

Get my sewing machine running, and turn one of Paul's pairs of shredded-knee pants into shorts.

Continue Petra's potty training efforts.  (This was also an unexpectedly big part of Stress Month for me.  Go figure.)

Actually weed and care for the vegetable garden.  Use time to pray for my family.

Line dry at least 50% of our laundry.  Pray for a short term mission team my church is sending to the Czech Republic.

Set up and play dropoly.com

Take cold showers.  Pray for missionaries.

Okay, so item number 7 is sort of a big deal for me. I love hot showers.  LOOOOOOOVE them.  The cold shower thing is sort of equivalent to giving up sweets for Lent.  It is a personal, somewhat painful sacrifice that I am dedicating to God.  If I seem a little grouchy in the mornings this month, you'll know why.

On May 18th, the team for the mission trip to the Czech Republic is holding a Pig Roast Fund raiser at our home.  Y'all are certainly invited - it's a lot of fun and some really tasty food.  From a Waste Month standpoint though, this is like trying to have a 7 Food fast in November with big, fat, Thanksgiving right smack in the middle.   I may try to investigate if there is anything we can do to reduce the overall waste impact of this event, but I can't make any promises.

Stress Month Summary
So, about that Stress month…
Here’s what went well:

Repeating the reading of a Psalm for several days in a row fed me more deeply.  I noticed the beauty of the language more.  Different aspects of how the scripture applied to my life or gave insight to other parts of the bible popped out.  It even inspired me to write a little poetry.

God showed me how my overly critical attitude was creating negativity, especially about my children.  This month I practiced countering thoughts about how the kids were driving me crazy with thoughts about their strengths and dearness.

This reduction in being critical and negative helped me with Petra’s potty training efforts.  We were able to make progress without getting frustrated or mad at each other.

 Here is what didn’t go so well:

I had said that I would engage in some aesthetic rest, like walking the dog, and I only did that once.

I said I would observe 7 prayer pauses per day, and I didn’t.  I found it was far too easy to forget, put off, or skip.  While I’m not beating myself up over this failure, its illuminating how I prioritize my time and my attention to God.

It is much easier for me to stick to a task or program that has a tangible outcome than to stick to a fuzzy goal like Pause with God.  This morning was a perfect snapshot of this trait.  I went to work a little late so that I could get some dinner going in the crockpot (good), hang some laundry to dry (good), and pack my lunch (good).  

Meanwhile my children were playing something (?) somewhere (?) else in the house.  I put good tasks ahead of unproductive time with them, even though I know unproductive time with them builds our relationships. While we were dating, Steve had the insight that deficiencies he identified in his relationship with God were the same deficiencies he had in his relationship with people, like me. 

Um… ouch.  Yes.  I’m much better at tasks than relationships.  I much rather pick up trash at a city mission than be available for my neighbor, my next door neighbor, to confide about her troubles with her husband’s destructive ex.  Steve and I are at our best when we are working on a project together, and God has been very gracious in giving us wonderful projects to work on together.  Still, it seems like we probably ought to be expanding our relationship repertoire.  (I almost wrote “relationship toolbox.”  I like to get things done.)

Now I am tempted to promise God that I will do better, try harder, and write a list of rules to guard quiet time with Him.  I think, instead, I am going to try confession and a humble heart.  I’m going to try asking Jesus for help to see where He leads me.

Change of view

I recently wrote about how nicely Steve was doing in Tae Kwon Do.  He came home from practice the other night with this story,

"I sparred with Steve [the fourth or fifth level black belt] tonight.  I was coming in with a skip kick [which involves hopping on one foot and kicking with the other,] and black-belt Steve did a side kick. He didn't have to do it very hard, because I was coming toward him.  All of a sudden I was on my back.  It was amazing how quickly the view changed."

Every once in a while the instructors remind you just how good they really are.

Observing the hours

This month I have been trying to observe 7 sacred pauses per day.  On a good day I observe about 5.  I've had Psalms to read at each pause, kind of like the Liturgy of the Hours.  The language of the Psalms is getting into my head.  Yesterday, in a spurt of creativity, I came up with 3 Psalm-like poems.

Waking Hour
Do I not delight in the sounds of the tea kettle?
     The changing pitch as it fills with water?
     The rumble on the stove?
Do I not hurry to its whistle?
     interrupting my work,
     answering its call?
Hot tea,
     my reward, comforting and nourishing.
Lord, call me like that,
     cause me to wait with anticipation for You.
Draw me to be refreshed in you
     and interrupt my world.
Be insistent,
     don't let me put you off.
Unsettle my complacency.
     Fill me up.
Make me pause
     so that I will delight in You.


Hour of Illumination

I think that I might be saved from pain by eating organic,
     or protect my children from going prodigal
     with some perfect blend of grace and discipline,
     or earn a blessing through a wise retirement fund,
But God made the Earth and everything in it.
He fashioned mysterious mitochondria,
     and hid angler fish in deep places.
Does the moon ever turn around?
     Does the strong force ever take a coffee break?
My destiny lies wrapped up in His plans.
     Lord, do not let me seek a righteousness apart from You.


Wisdom Hour

What do you long for, my soul?
     Heart, what are you chasing after?
A career track?
     A lovely house?
     Children who rise up and call you blessed?
What am I dreaming after?
     A published book?
     A changed life?
     Significance?
The Word of God walked the dust of Earth for fewer years than I,
     Built neither Pyramids nor Roman roads still in use today.
Jesus longed after His Father's will
     and pursued His loving mercy.
Poured Himself out,
     arms stretched wide,
          until empty,
              nothing held back.
His well done work completed.
     Go, my soul, and do likewise.

Gold star for Steve

Some time ago Steve started reading the bible at Joshua.  He has been diligently reading through and yesterday he finished Malachi. 

Yay Steve!  That's a whole lot of prophets to go through.  (I've decided that Isaiah, Jeremiah, and Ezekiel are so long because when you are going through hard times they seem to last forever.)

In other news, Steve has recently tilled the vegetable garden, planted the peas and lettuce, cleaned out the smaller chicken coop, and consequently fertilized part of the garden.

In Tae Kwon Do, he, Paul and Julia just earned their senior green belts.  At a previous belt test Steve was given high praise for his sparing.  He was told by his judge that he destroyed his opponent and did a good job of using a mix of different moves.  The judge told him that his versatility was a mark of a black belt.  (Steve is, by the way, very good-natured about destroying his sparing partner and often checks to make sure they are okay.)

At the risk of sounding Pollyanna...

Last month, during a food fast, one of the things I was brought to face was my critical spirit. I am bent toward being too quick to see and condemn weaknesses (or what I consider weaknesses) in others.  “Oh hey, you have this speck in your eye, let me help you with that,” while I knock them over with the plank in my own eye. I don’t think of myself as judgmental, so it was a little startling. 

So now we are in stress fast

month, and a couple of different threads are coming together here.

I was on the stairs at work thinking about how Julia (age 6)  has been driving me batty, lately.  If we are at the table for dinner, I might ask her to get a spoon out of the drawer for her soup.  She gets up, twirls in circles three times, stares into the cupboard for 20 seconds, gets a cup, dances back to her chair, and then can’t figure out why she still can’t eat her soup.

Makes me crazy.

It went through my mind that if this were somebody else’s child, I would think it was adorable.  And I kind of clung on to that thought.  Julia is adorable.  Maybe I can enjoy her more if I remember that – she is adorable.  Maybe I would feel less stress if I were not so critical of her 6 year old girlishness. 

A day or two later, it occurred to me that I could extrapolate that idea.  (Brilliance take time.)  When people talk to me about my children, I tend to answer with things that I think of as self-deprecating, but are really child-deprecating.  Paul’s teacher reported that Paul had great oral expression.  I joked that she meant he talked too much.  Maybe I should back up and adopt, “He has great oral expression.” Instead of trying to look humble by being negative, I could just be grateful.

I think I have a good running list of my family’s strengths and weaknesses in my head.  It is good to know both.  Part of being a parent or leader is correcting and directing.  But I think that they and I would benefit if I talked up our strengths more often and even gave myself permission to revel in them. 

I’ve tried to hold on to that idea during the recent potty training offensive I’ve had with Petra.  We’ve made some progress, but more importantly, I have enjoyed being close to my stubborn  independent little girl and seeing more clearly what makes her tick.

I am now looking for other ways I manufacture stress and negativity for myself, especially through being overly critical.  I have a feeling I’m going to find some applications in work pretty quickly. sigh.

So, if anybody asks

Paul is creative and has great oral expression.

Julia is smart and spunky.

Petra is independent and imaginative.

Nathan is friendly and optimistic.

My husband is blessedly predictable and has a big heart.

I am smart, funny, and pretty.

And so, my dear friends, are you.

More Nathan stuff

Nathan is rolling over like a champ now, at least for back to belly.  I'm going to have to start cleaning up legos and barbie shoes real soon.

He has gotten more use out of the toys on the baby swing than any of his siblings.  I don't remember any of them leaning forward to get the toys like he does.  

I forgot to mention in the previous Nathan post that he has started eating baby food.  He has mostly just had rice cereal, some crackers Grandma snuck in, and raw celery (see picture below.)

Petra potty training; Sarah mommy training

This is going to be one of those infamous mommy blogs on potty training.  Quite probably too much information.  But it is also about spending time with my daughter, seeing her more clearly, and loving her.

So, some of my children have an INDEPENDENT streak.  They are not slaves to the opinions of others, nor are they driven for approval.  This is a great character trait, but it can make motivating them difficult.

Take Petra and potty training.  Ah, my dear little 3 year old, who knows exactly what to do on the potty, but doesn’t really care.  Why should she take precious time out of her day, time which could be spent playing, to sit on the boring old toilet, and then have ugh to wash her hands? 

Last Thursday we started a potty training offensive.  This may be the reason why I haven’t had time to write much lately.  We used:

• Real underwear for instant accident feedback
• M&M rewards
• A timer because, yes, she really does need to sit on the potty within 15 minutes of draining her sippy cup of juice
• Marbles as a tangible measure of progress to a goal.  (A marble goes into the jar for dry underwear. A marble comes out of the jar for wet underwear.  When the marbles reach the line I drew, we are going have a party with cake.)
• Peer reinforcement.  We had the great joy of having Petra’s cousin visit this weekend.  She is also potty training.  I think this might be one of the best bonding weekends that my sister and I have ever had.

And the results?

• I have been surprised by how much I am enjoying this time of focused attention on Petra.  It’s a joy to be with her.
• Petra has started hiding if she has an accident.  This is not helpful, but it counts as progress because it means that she cares.
• Petra took off her own dirty diaper (yes we are still throwing those in the mix) yesterday in the bathrrom.  This entailed a lot of cleanup afterward by mommy, but it counts as progress because she was trying to do the right thing.
• She likes seeing the marbles accumulate.
• Petra likes to go potty “by herself” sometimes.  Oh, this reminds me of my little sister’s “I can do it myself!” when she was three.  I should have seen this and leveraged it sooner.  Petra is so independent that she will take more pride in this work if she feels like it is all her own.  This is something I can cultivate!  This is something I can nurture.

Lord, please give me time and eyes to see the natural bent on my children.  Help me to guide them on the way they should go.

Nathan Notes

Nathan is doing great.  Babies never cease to amaze me.  How do they learn so much so quickly?

In the last two weeks Nathan has transitioned from the cradle beside our bed to the crib in the nursery.  He stayed in the cradle longer than any of his siblings.  He was sleeping so well in the cradle that there was no good reason to move him earlier, and it was easier to keep our room warm in the chilly and long winter weather.

The last two nights I put him to sleep on his belly.  It is a little early for that, but it seems to help him sleep through the night.  Can I just say that one of my favorite things to see is a baby sleeping with his legs curled under him and his little fanny sticking up in the air?  That just kills me.  And I am justifying putting him on his tummy to sleep because he is now…

Rolling from his back to his belly!  I looked down at him on the floor Saturday evening and realized he wasn’t on his back anymore.  I said, “Nathan, you rolled over!”  My sister was visiting and told me she had seen him doing that throughout the day.  I’m going to have to keep a close eye on this little guy.

He likes splashing in the bath tub.  If I sit him up, he pumps his little arms up and down and pounds the water.  He is lunging and grabbing toys, hair, noses, anything that gets close.  His motto is Carpe diem, carpe omnem.  Seize the day, seize everything!